Classics of american lawyers
The Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers Journal printed the following questions actually asked of witnesses during a trial. The responses to some of the questions were given by insightful witnesses.
- Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
- The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
- Were you present when your picture was taken?
- Were you alone or by yourself?
- Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?
- Did he kill you?
- How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?
- You were there until the time you left. Is that true?
- Q: She had three children, right?
Q: How many were boys?
Q: Were there any girls?
- Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?
- Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
- Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?
- Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice that I sent to your attorneys?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
- Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
- Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
- Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And. Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
- Q: Mr. Slatery, you went on a rate elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?
A: I went to Europe, sir.
Q: And you took your new wife?
- Q: So the date of conception was Aug. 8?
Q: And what were you doing at the time?
- Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
A: I have been since early childhood.
- Q: You were not shot in the fracas?
A: No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel.
- Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Q: Did you check for blood presure?
Q: Did you check for breathing?
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.
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